People often describe feeling a sense of relief when they receive a mental health diagnosis after years of unexplained symptoms. Pete Davidson, who has borderline personality disorder (BPD), is one of them. In a conversation with Glenn Close for the Variety series Actors on Actors, Davidson spoke about what it was like to finally receive his BPD diagnosis in 2017.
“I got diagnosed with BPD a few years ago, and I was always just so confused all the time, and just thought something was wrong, and didn’t know how to deal with it,” Davidson, 27, recalled. “Then, when somebody finally tells you, the weight of the world feels lifted off your shoulders. You feel so much better.”
The actors were discussing the ways in which they could both relate to Close’s new movie Hillbilly Elegy, in which Close plays the mother of a woman with a heroin addiction (played by Amy Adams). “I think it was a very honest view of addiction and the terrible difficulty of getting out of that cycle,” said Close, whose sister dealt with addiction and mental health issues. “Because we weren’t close at the time, I really didn’t know what she was going through,” Close added.
Like Davidson, it took Close’s sister a long time to figure out what was going on. She was finally diagnosed with bipolar disorder at age 50. “If she had been diagnosed sooner, it would have made such a big difference in her life,” Close said. (Her sister, Jessie Close, wrote a memoir about living with the condition titled Resilience, which includes chapters by Glenn.) Davidson said he hopes Close’s sister felt a sense of relief upon receiving a diagnosis to help make sense her experience, the same way that he did.
Davidson had a long road of mental health challenges and unexplained symptoms before he was diagnosed with BPD at age 23. The actor previously said he was “in and out” of inpatient treatment facilities for mental health issues since age nine. In the fall of 2016, he started having troubling episodes of intense emotions, like rage, and then forgetting what happened, on top of serious depression. Thinking his cannabis use might be to blame—Davidson was using the drug to help manage his Crohn’s disease—he went to rehab twice. A bipolar diagnosis was suggested, but the meds he was prescribed didn’t help—and quitting weed didn’t seem to make a difference, either.
Finally, in 2017, one of Davidson’s psychiatrists diagnosed him with BPD. “He was always saying before this big meltdown, ‘You’re probably bipolar or borderline, we’re just going to have to figure it out,’” Davidson has said.
It’s actually pretty common for people to conflate bipolar disorder and BPD, as both conditions cause extreme shifts in mood and behavior. However, the nature and frequency of these changes is different, as SELF explained. And people with BPD usually have a fear of abandonment, an unsteady sense of self, and a history of unstable personal relationships that isn’t typically seen with bipolar disorder.
People with BPD may be first diagnosed with bipolar disorder, or another condition that has overlapping symptoms (such as depression or anxiety). And as SELF reported, most people with BPD have other mental health conditions as well, which can also delay diagnosis, according to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH). Another reason for delayed diagnosis may be a hesitancy among some experts to diagnose personality disorders in people under 18 because they may still be emotionally and psychologically maturing—although, as SELF explained previously, other experts strongly advocate for diagnosing BPD in teenagers.
Scientists have not identified one clear cause of BPD, and research suggests that a combination of inherited factors (like a close relative having BPD), neurological factors, and environmental factors (such as childhood trauma) increase a person’s risk for the disorder.
People with BPD are at a heightened risk for self-harm and suicide. (Davidson, who also deals with depression, has spoken openly about attempting suicide as a child and experiencing suicidal thoughts as an adult.)
The first-line treatment for BPD is dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT), which helps people learn emotional regulation skills. Sometimes medication (such as mood stabilizers) is also prescribed to help manage symptoms. Davidson has talked about using both DBT and meds to help manage his BPD following a few “real rough” years.
People with BPD are often unusually creative and empathetic, Francheska Perepletchikova, Ph.D., assistant professor of psychology in psychiatry at Weill Cornell Medical College and founder and director of the Youth-Dialectical Behavior Therapy Program at Weill Cornell Medicine and NewYork-Presbyterian Hospital, previously told SELF. And as Katherine Dixon-Gordon, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and assistant professor who studies BPD at the University of Massachusetts Amherst, told SELF: With a diagnosis, proper treatment, and hard work, people with BPD can see tremendous reduction in their symptoms and live full and happy lives.
Related:
- Pete Davidson on His Mental Health: ‘The Last Few Years Have Been Real Rough With Me’
- 13 Facts Everyone Should Know About Borderline Personality Disorder
- 6 Ways to Manage Bipolar Disorder Triggers During COVID-19